Do a Proper Check Before You Proceed

I remember my mum paying a 2-year rent for a building when she wanted to start a school several years ago. The house was strategically located and the design was just perfect for a nursery and primary school. There really wouldn't be a need for serious changes or modifications so she eagerly decided to take the place .

Some days before the school was supposed to kick off, she took the keys to the house and decided to have a quick stroll through it in preparation for the move in of furniture the following day. She went from room to room trying to envision what the settings of the class would be like with the teacher standing before the pupils.

And then she got to the door of a particular room. She carefully inserted every single key on the bunch she was given into the key hole but none would open it. It was at that point she remembered that the person in charge of the building had given an excuse to her on the day she came to check the building initially that the locks on the door to that particular room was bad.

She called a carpenter who came to force the door open. To her utmost surprise, she saw that someone had been buried in the room. Saying she was shocked was an understatement. She lost the rent because they wouldn't refund the money.

Sometimes, the excitement that comes with being newly engaged to a handsome man or being offered a new job after years of searching for one may make us overlook certain important areas of the decisions we are about to take. We just hurry off to say "Yes" without checking with the Holy Spirit if He is okay with that decision.

Like my mum who could have insisted on them opening up the door to that one room for her to inspect but didn’t and suffered the consequence of taking a decision in haste, we will find ourselves in a ditch if we refuse to allow God do the check on EVERY step we are about to take.

 We can save ourselves the stress of going round in circles or being utterly robbed of our God given destinies/resources by simply learning to patiently wait for the Lord to give us a clear or not about every decision we are about to make. Leave no stone unturned. Take no chances.

A child of the God should walk in the spirit by following the lead of the Holy Spirit.

Before you jump off the cliff, be sure it is God that is asking you to jump and not some self motivated voice on your inside.

Pause and Pray before you proceed to make your final decision.

~ OMOSEBI Mary Omolola
© 2016

Celebrate Your Love

It so happens that my husband's birthday and our wedding anniversary are exactly 7days apart so i normally put up posts to celebrate both on Facebook. Last year, someone on my friend list made a comment on the birthday post I had put up to celebrate my husband. This person said I should not proclaim my husband. And his reason is that he felt I should be scared of husband snatchers. All I could do at that time was smile endlessly.

Here really is the point. I am a minister and my marriage is a ministry. I am an encourager and my marriage should be too. I don't talk about my life to brag to anyone but to encourage people that they can have fulfilling relationships under God. I do what i do out of personal conviction. I have never said my life/spouse/marriage was perfect. I am simply an epitome of God's grace and I am ALWAYS humbled by that fact.

However, we hear too many negative stories about marriage in our wold today. We need to counter the effect of all the negativity though by pitching the positive stories to the glory of God. The very reason I love posts where spouses celebrate their marriages of several years.

I remember someone reacting to that friend's comment and asking why I still thanked the person for such a comment. My response was that we see things differently one from another and my show of gratitude was not sarcastic. I meant it. It doesn't necessarily mean one is right and the other is wrong if we hold varying views about an issue. What's important is to have the right motives for whatever we do and how we do them.

Well, as usual I talked to God about that incidence and I got a clear. . .

"There is no fear in love" was what I heard in my spirit.

I love the book of Songs of Solomon like wetin happen. And it is a support system for this post.

The man and his woman in that book did so well celebrating their love. They told each other how wonderful they were to each other. . . And they told others too.

The love they shared obviously thrived so well. They watered their love with their words as they did with their actions.

I have heard some married women say that the last time they heard their husbands tell them that they loved them was on their wedding day. And God help those who got married in a country like Nigeria where you don't even have to say "I love you", to your spouse on your wedding day.

I feel so elated when my husband speaks highly about me while teaching in Church or while just speaking to people. Of course I know he loves me but we still make sure to affirm our love for each other at every given opportunity.

I sometimes laugh within myself when I see someone talking to the spouse over the phone end the call with "you too". I could almost guess that the person on the other side of the phone had said "I love you". You shouldn't get tired of saying "I love you" to your spouse. . . And be sure you mean it.

When last did you tell your wife or husband that you love them?

When last did you send an SMS or email to remind him/her how much you cherish him/her?

How about you pick up your phone and give your spouse a call. . .Tell him/her you are thinking of him and you love her.

Yes, he/she probably knows that you love him/her. It is however imperative that you tell your spouse constantly.

It's okay if you decide to celebrate your love only in the corners of your house.

 It's okay also if you decide to ask others to celebrate with you like the Shulamite in the book of Song of Solomon. 

However way you decide. . .

Choose wisely. . .

Just make sure you celebrate and strengthen the chords of your love. Celebrate your spouse! Celebrate the grace of God. Celebrate God's way.

~ OMOSEBI Mary Omolola
© 2016

Organise Annual General Meetings

Two men sat at the table next to mine in a restaurant and I just couldn't help but overhear their discussion because they wouldn't just tone their voices down. The part of their conversation that struck me was something like this:

Mr. A: How is your marriage my friend? You don't seem to be looking happy these days.
Mr. B: You just asked me a JAMB question o. The last 2 years seem like 20 years. I am even tired. My wife is nothing like she was in the first few months of our marriage. She is now always moody and complaining that I don't give her the attention she desires from me. We stopped praying together months back sef. Our sex life is a total mess. The few times we get intimate, she would just lay there. It seems she just allows me to have my way out of obligation. And I am the only one that initiates the intimacy. Thank God I am a Christian, who know what measures I might have taken?
Mr. A: Hmmm. .  . It is well o. But have you talked with her about all these issues you have raised?
Mr. B: We barely talk o. Except for the casual greetings.
Mr. A: My dear brother, you really need to have a meeting with your wife immediately before things go totally out of hands. Set out time to discuss with your wife and allow her pour out her mind without restrictions. You should do the same too. I will be praying along with you

I smiled to myself as I gulped the last portion of my drink and rose to leave the restaurant. Thank God for Mr. A whose advice was just what I would have said too (Else I might have been forced to join their discussion. Lol).

Now to my message for married folks today:

I recommend that couples organise Annual General Meetings  (AGM), or Quaterly General Meetings (QGM) or Monthly General Meetings  (MGM) as the case may be, for the stakeholders in your marriage.

This is important to help you keep in touch with each other. Like I always say, "I just don't want to wake up one day and find out that a truck (not only lizard) can now pass in between my husband and I."

These meetings need to be intentionally fixed and regular. Go to the meeting without bias and be ready to listen and speak with all sincerity. The complaints from all parties involved should be matters arising and dealt with accordingly. Resolve to make sure that you attend to every matter without any iota of selfishness.

This is not a call to battle. It is a call to seek peace.

Let God be the chairman of those meetings. Yield yourselves to His directions for your situation through His words and trust Him to help you maintain decorum in your marriage.

When is your next general meeting going to be?